1. A Jar of Cotton Balls That No One Ever Uses
The cotton balls are usually in a clear glass jar, maybe with a matching one for Q-tips. They look tidy and classic, but realistically, how often are you using a cotton ball? You’re not removing nail polish in the bathroom mirror, and micellar water wipes have taken over skincare routines. Still, they sit there, untouched and oddly pristine.
We keep them because they make us feel prepared. Like if a beauty emergency or impromptu science experiment happens, we’re ready. They add to the illusion of self-care mastery, even if we’ve forgotten what toner even does. Plus, the jar itself makes us feel like we’re winning at adulthood.
2. Decorative Towels That No One Is Allowed to Use
There’s always at least one towel in the bathroom that looks great but has never touched a drop of water. Often hanging perfectly on a towel rack or folded on a shelf, these towels are more of a visual statement than a functional item. They exist for guests we don’t even have or to make the space feel “finished.” Using them feels like a crime against interior design.
Yet we keep them because they make the bathroom look clean and curated, like something out of a magazine. It’s less about drying your hands and more about having your act together. They’re comforting in the way a made bed is comforting—even if no one sees it but you. And when the dog knocks one off the rack, you weirdly feel a pang of loss.
3. A Candle That’s Only Been Lit Once
There’s always a half-burned candle sitting somewhere on the back of the toilet or by the sink. It probably got lit once during a deep-cleaning day or when company was over, then promptly forgotten. Technically it doesn’t freshen the air if it’s not burning, and it definitely collects more dust than ambiance. But throwing it away feels weirdly final, like giving up on peace itself.
We keep it there because it could be useful in a power outage—or when you’re trying to pretend your 2006 apartment is a spa. Its scent has long faded, but its presence says, “I care about my space.” It’s emotional decor: part memory, part potential. And sometimes that’s more powerful than utility.
4. A Decorative Soap That Smells Like a Vacation
You know the one: a seashell-shaped bar or a pastel oval that’s never been wet. It might smell like lavender or something ambiguously labeled “ocean breeze.” It’s hard as a rock by now, but still holds court in its little ceramic dish. No one uses it, and everyone knows they’re not supposed to.
These soaps are little nostalgia bombs, often gifted or bought on a whim at a boutique. They remind us of beach trips or moms who had “guest bathrooms” you weren’t allowed to actually use. Their continued existence is not about hygiene, it’s about ambiance. Also, they prove that yes, you can have nice things—even if you never touch them.
5. A Plant That’s Hanging On for Dear Life
Whether real or fake, there’s almost always some greenery in the corner or on a shelf. If it’s real, it’s probably a pothos struggling with the low light and humidity swings. If it’s fake, it’s just dusty enough to make you wonder if it’s even worth it. Either way, the plant is more for morale than for function.
We keep it because something green makes the room feel alive, even if it’s mostly decorative. A bathroom without plants feels sterile, almost too clinical. With plants, even ones on life support, we feel closer to nature in a space that’s otherwise all tile and glass. And honestly, that emotional lift matters more than oxygen output.
6. A Bath Mat That Never Dries
It’s soft, it’s fluffy, and it’s always a little damp no matter how long it’s been since anyone showered. Bath mats serve a basic function, but many go beyond to become borderline relics that never get washed or replaced. The grip is worn out and the edges are curling, but it’s still doing its job… kind of. It’s definitely not adding to the hygiene of the room at this point.
But we keep it because it’s comfortable and familiar. Stepping out of the shower onto cold tile is a horror no one wants. That mat has been there for years, absorbing not just water but memories of countless Monday mornings. It’s gross, yes—but it’s your gross.
7. Perfume or Cologne You Don’t Even Like Anymore
There’s always a bottle of something that hasn’t been spritzed since Obama was in office. Maybe it was a gift, maybe it was a phase, maybe you thought it made you smell “grown-up.” The scent is too strong, or not strong enough, or just not you anymore. But you don’t toss it.
We keep it because smell is powerful, and parting with a scent feels like closing a chapter. Sometimes you sniff it just to remember who you were when you bought it. It also makes the bathroom feel like part of your “getting ready” space—even if the bottle just sits there, judging you. Nostalgia wins again.
8. A Random Drawer Full of Sample-Size Products
You’ll find old hotel lotions, mystery face masks, and half-used travel toothpastes. It’s the graveyard of hope and tiny packaging. Most of it is expired, but you keep thinking it might come in handy on a future trip. Spoiler: it never does.
We keep these because they make us feel prepared and pampered at the same time. Like, sure, you’ve never used that vitamin C serum sample, but someday you might! It’s a miniature luxury, a promise of self-care that costs nothing now. And throwing them out feels like you’re giving up on future-you.
9. A Magazine or Book That’s Never Been Read in There
There’s often a book with a bent spine or a magazine from 2018 sitting under the sink or on the toilet tank. You may have intended to read it, but scrolling your phone always wins. Still, it remains like a relic of a time when people actually sat and read in the bathroom. It’s more symbolic than functional at this point.
We keep it because it gives the illusion of slower, more intentional living. Like you’re someone who lights a candle and reads an article while soaking in the tub. It says “refined” even if you haven’t turned a page in years. The moment it’s gone, the space feels a little too transactional.
10. A Decorative Sign About Bathing or Relaxing
Maybe it says “Soak,” “Relax,” or something punny like “Wash Your Worries Away.” It’s hung slightly crooked above the toilet or propped up on a shelf. It adds absolutely nothing to the room’s functionality but has somehow survived multiple redecoration phases. You don’t love it, but you’d miss it if it were gone.
We keep these signs because they inject a tiny bit of personality into a utilitarian space. They’re a little cheesy, sure—but so is singing in the shower, and we’re not giving that up. They’re shorthand for “I tried.” And sometimes, effort counts more than taste.
11. A Bar of Soap That’s More Sliver Than Substance
At the edge of the sink or tub is a soap bar that’s been worn down to a translucent shard. It’s basically unusable, slippery, and threatening to break into crumbs at any second. But instead of tossing it, we let it hang on like the final act of a long-running play. Technically, it’s still soap.
We keep it because there’s something weirdly satisfying about using up every last bit. It’s a frugal gesture in a world of waste. Also, the replacement bar feels like a commitment we’re not ready to make. Until that shard disappears completely, it’s still part of the routine.
12. A Bottle of Bubble Bath That’s Mostly Water
It looks like a luxury product but feels like a science experiment. The label is faded, the cap barely closes, and the liquid inside is suspiciously thin. You haven’t taken a bubble bath in years, but every time you clean the bathroom, you think “someday.” That someday hasn’t arrived, but the bottle remains.
We keep it because it represents possibility—the fantasy of an uninterrupted, candle-lit evening. It’s not about the bubbles; it’s about what they mean. In a world of chaos, that old bottle is a dream deferred, but not forgotten. And that emotional comfort is something no shower gel can replace.
This post 12 Things Found in Every American Bathroom That Are Technically Useless but Emotionally Required was first published on American Charm.
